What is the story people will make up about you if all they had to go on was observing you walk down the street, or sit on a bus, or enter your office?
As much as we are all trying to not care as much about what people think of us (as we should all strive to do!), the fact is that as humans we will automatically fill in the blanks when we see or experience something or someone where we don’t get the full picture. We are just wired this way.
I would encourage you to check in with “what you look like” as you move through the world. What is your facial expression? What are your eyes doing? What is the energy that is emanating off of you? If you are like me, when in deep concentration or thought – I often revert to the classic “resting b**ch face.” I don’t even know I am doing it. And in most cases, that expression is in no way a reflection of my mood or energy. But I guarantee you that people observing me would fill in the blanks about what they can’t see – and it probably won’t be positive!
I firmly believe we get back (or have reflected back to us) exactly what we put into the world. If we have a deep frown or avert our eyes or automatically assume that things will go wrong or people will DO us wrong – we will invariably be right. So what if we came out of default mode and showed up differently? What if we met people’s eyes and offered a smile or friendly word of greeting? What if we gave people the grace to be fallible or imperfect and just glided through those experiences more neutrally? What if our default mindset was that everything would work out and was always working in our favor?
I will tell you what happens – people reflect your positivity back to you, difficult or frustrating situations are more bearable, and things DO tend to work out in you favor. Of course you are going to encounter people and situations that are counter to that – perhaps they even seem to rebel and become more negative when faced with your positivity. I mean, I am not trying to be a PollyAnna here! But you will find in general you do get back exactly what you put out there. And honestly, if all you did was manage to make a tough situation more neutral or not give the sourpuss one more opening to continue their spiral into negativity – its still a win 😉
I recorded this thought well over a week ago – and have found that it just continues to be more and more true. I am meeting more people than I ever have in my travels. I am almost always greeted with smiles and friendliness. Things just seem to “work out” as I go about my day. It costs you nothing to give it a try – and you stand to gain a lot!